Judy's Solutions

Are you living in default or are you in the driver’s seat?

First

Consider that it doesn’t matter if you are dissatisfied with life’s situations and the problems you face; it is what it is. What you need to do is accept things as they are and find a way to deal with it in a manner that you can accept.

Second

Consider that your attitude about life events affects the habits you develop and what you get back from life.

• In general, a positive attitude reaps positive responses from people you interact with and life gives back what you reflect in your expectations.
• A negative attitude reaps negativity from people around you and sets you up for a negative response from life.
• A healthy attitude makes a huge difference in your ability to make wise decisions,
  • affecting how proactive you are in engaging yourself in life,
  • and affecting the position you place yourself because of choices you make and the consequences you receive.

Did you catch what I just said?

Let me break this down for you.

• Attitude makes a difference in how proactive you are in choices you make, and whether you are living in default or sitting in the driver’s seat of life.
• Sitting in the driver’s seat means you are making your own decisions instead of waiting for something to happen and then let it drag you down.
• Instead of looking at your attitude and accepting the lesson you can learn from a bad situation, you go to the same place you always go to when you don’t like what life dishes out to you: being angry with God, your parents, your employer or anyone you think has it better than you.
• Living in default means that, instead of realizing life sometimes hands out doses of misfortune to everyone and you are no different or think you are singled out for some reason, you just throw up your hands and give up!
• You develop a bad attitude toward those who have a better life than you when you live in default instead of being proactive.
• You blame people for what they have that you don’t and want, rationalizing that they had better opportunities than you without knowing if that is really true, and then expect them to help you out because they live better than you.
• Sitting in the driver’s seat means that, instead of forcing someone to make decisions for you because you can’t or won’t, you make your own decisions and take responsibility for them.

Be around positive people

I am talking about being around people who are positive thinking, who have a healthy self-worth, and hope and vision for a better tomorrow. These type of people keep you motivated and focused on what matters instead of caving in to the problems going on around you.

Does this mean

You ignore reality and keep your head in clouds? Of course not. You have to be balanced in your life and have a healthy perspective of what is going on around you. It means you associate with people who understand the situations you face and know how to appropriately respond to challenges and still be in the driver’s seat of life.

Comments

As always, I invite you to leave a comment on this subject. I would love to hear from you.

Being The Most of Your Ability

I enjoy some of the comments I get from leaders on Facebook.  When I find great messages that I think you will appreciate, I pass them on to you. This one came from Darnell Curtis that he sent a message to the members of http://www.facebook.com/l/06c34;YourNight.com.

To Your Night, Thought of the day Do not base your abilities on someone elses results, YOU MAY BE BETTER THAN THEM….

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I completely agree with Darnell Curtis’ statement. We often put too much pressure on ourselves and our downline when we try to be like somebody else and try to do the work of somebody else. We are all unique. We have our own challenges and abilities, that are unique to us; they belong to us and no one else.

We need to be wise about our expectations and set goals according to accurate thinking* (I will cover this topic more at another time.) Remember that YOU are unique. There is no one like you.That is why you must only demand from yourself the things you have the power to affect, change, or control. Doing otherwise will frustrate you and those with whom you associate or do business.

Use the following guidelines when setting goals according to your aibilities:

• Use Accurate Thinking. As you make plans for your future and set goals, do not buy into the hype that is often associated with Network Marketing or try to be like others you believe are successful.
• Practice good work ethics, doing what you say you will do and follow through with the plans you’ve made.
• Choose who you listen to: Listen to only people more interested in your success than in their own.
• Keep your perspective in check. This mean you don’t try to run faster than you should and then fail because your perspective was out of whack.
• Stay in balance. Examine your priorities to make sure you are in alignment with God and Success Principles in order to be successful in life and business.
• Keep your priorities straight. Do only what you and your spouse have agreed upon as being important and will protect harmony in your life and home.
• Do NOT chase after people. Allow them to come to you because they know you, you have what they want, and they want to do business with you. To do this, your mind needs to be thinking right, your priorities need to be in alignment, and you need to be balanced. When people feel that they are on your radar, they will run in the opposite direction. People need to know that you are there for them but they won’t believe it if you chase them.
• Do NOT pretend to be successful or try to convince someone that you are a leader. True leaders just lead and don’t have to talk about being a leader. In other words, your actions speak louder than words. Doing what leaders do makes you a leader just as doing what successful people do leads to success. If you are not doing those things leaders and successful people do, then YOU ARE NOT a leader and you will not be successful.
• Be yourself, unless you are not the type of person with whom you would want to do business or to be on the other side of a discussion or an invite. You would not be impressed with someone who talks too much, doesn’t look or act professional, or is pushy.
• Take an inventory of your strengths and weaknesses. Work on improving yourself in the weak areas through positive motivation and then decide how to take advantages of your strengths.
• Use your abilities to help those with whom you associate. When appropriate, offer to help someone FOR FREE and without strings attached or taking advantage of them. The more you share your abilities with people, the sharper your abilities become.
• Make a difference in someone’s life; doing so builds self-worth. Notice that I said it builds self-worth and not self-esteem. Self-esteem is the result of how others interact with you and how they make you feel. On the other hand, self-worth is how you feel about yourself when you understand how you have added value to someone’s life.
• Be true to yourself and the commitments you’ve made to yourself. You cannot allow people to steal your dreams, to keep you in a box or do things to prevent you have achieving the goals you’ve set for yourself. You need to love them for the value they contribute to your life and accept them for who they are, but you have to set healthy boundaries for them. Let them know you value their judgment and ask that they trust your judgment as well. If it’s a mistake then that’s the end result but you need to do it and see how far it takes you.

Being the most of your abilities means you fulfill the measure of your creation and strive to reach your full potential. What can be more satisfying than this?

*Note: I wrote about accurate thinking in my book “The Treasure Box Series, Volume I: Peace, Joy, and Happiness”, copyright dated November 2005 and published by BookSurge.